In 08′ he broke on to the Yankees and I instantly loved him. A hard work ethic, speed, some pop, and great D. He is exactly the type of player most teams need. In the late 90s and early 00, it was Paul O’Neil. Then it was Brett Gardner. He holds himself to a high standard, he pushes teammates and he never gives up despite the fact that fans still question his value.
His value to me is priceless. You can not convince me otherwise, do not try. Trust me don’t try, its not worth it for you. He has given everything to this team for well over a decade and frankly it pisses me off that I have to defend his honor daily!
On twitter today, fellow grunt talker Samantha asked the following question. “Which Yankees player would you want as a travel companion during a zombie Apocalypse?”
Without hesitation, lets hang with Brett. Brett bangs! First off, we are both beautiful bald men with tempers and the desire to always win! Second, Brett isn’t scared of anything, not even a gross stalker. He’s not scared of zombies, he’s more scared of the crazies….Brett would be a 1st ballot HOF zombie slayer and is needed on my team. He destroyed out dugout, and would use that special power to destroy zombies! Plus unlike Manny Poopchado, Brett would hustle. You need hustle in a zombie war. I’m not picking Red Blunder, he’d only be affective on offense anyway. I’d use Rodders as a decoy so he’s probably getting eaten 1st, but not me and my best friend Brett!
Brett is the greatest to ever live, that’s a fact! Facts are the best and can’t be wrong! Fact he deserves like 20 gold gloves even though its not possible. Also i hate Alex Gordon, he steals Brett’s gold gloves like Altuve did the MVP! May 11th is hereby Brett Bangs day, I want parades and anything Brett likes. A statue outside every major city, dedicated to his godliness.
He works so hard and that is what I have always admired. Won’t let me down as the zombies creep in. He was a walk on in college and his coach said nobody works harder. I want that work ethic on my team always. Many of you twitter bums disrespect brett and its unacceptable! We are lucky to have him! Oh we would travel the world saving you all from the zombies. Id even try to say Red Blunder, but if he went full zombie….. bye bye blunder!
Brett is my hero and in times of zombies, let Brett bang!